…hem some pants?

So in my last post, I mentioned that the world had given me lemons. I’ve collected a few more fruits since that post, and the road has been bumpy.

And then yesterday I did something I haven’t done in a relatively long time. I took out my sewing machine. I wasn’t tackling a new project or some great creative idea; we switched from khakis to black pants at work, and I had to hem a pair before I went in to close. It was a simple task, but I found the physical work soothing. Concentrating on measuring, placing pins straight, winding a bobbin…all of these easy and seemingly mundane tasks, well, I felt more real than I have in a long time.

I have another pair that need hemmed, and I close again tonight, so I hope to find that same simple joy this afternoon before heading in for the chaos.

It also amazes me still how even just bringing up the legs of pants I bought at a store can boost my confidence. I walked into work yesterday thinking “yeah…these pants look so good because I made them look good.”

I’m still not feeling ready to explore crafts more deeply again. I took out the sewing machine because one pair of pants for working a full time schedule is just not enough. It was a labor of necessity, not one of love, but if I have to force myself to do these things and then find joy in them, then so be it.

If I had to sum up what I’ve been feeling most lately, it’s foolish. For years I was wrapped up in trickster mythology – Coyote, Raven, Hermes, etc. The idea of the Fool was one that I was drawn to; a wise character whose wisdom blinds them to wise choices. Fools and Tricksters were often revered as a marvelous teachers. It falls to us to learn from their follies. They were stark reflections of our own poor choices, and our own need to learn from mistakes, no matter how smart we are.

Coyote, specifically, was one of my favorites. Coyote laughs when he should cry, and he cries when others laugh. I have cried a lot lately, and this morning I thought “perhaps I should laugh instead.” I did, and it lifted my spirits. So the Trickster proves again his wisdom, and I learn once again that I have much to learn.

Today I’m going to pick myself up enough to hem that last pair of pants. It seems trivial, but in a strange way, for me, it is the most important thing in the world.

One thought on “…hem some pants?

  1. A Zen Koan says: A student told the master, “I am ready to learn. Please teach me.” The master asked the student, “Have you eaten yet?” The student replied, “Yes.” The master said, “Then go and wash your bowl.” The student was suddenly enlightened.
    My college teacher at the time said this means that you should find your spirituality and support in the small everyday things and activities in life, and that these seemingly insignificant tasks are important because they can be such a comfort to us, they bring us back into the present and help us find our “center.” The past no longer exists except in memories, which are subjective. The future is only a projection or plan which changes as it is realized. Only the present is real. Go wash your bowl.
    Also, knitting is great therapy.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s